Join The “Me Too” Movement

 

A new movement has been born out of the recent Harvey Weinstein disclosure.  Women around the world are coming out of the shadows of sexual trauma, and exposing the pain and shame that they have endured as a result of a sexual predator stalking their innocence, in a pursuit of indiscriminate pleasure.

The “Me Too” movement is a brave and courageous step for awareness, as well as a beacon of hope of healing for those still stuck in the secret surroundings of silent suffering.

Whenever we come out of secrecy and share our pain with others, the power of shame is broken, which opens up opportunities for healing and wholeness.

It’s time for the real men to join the “Me Too” movement.  

Research shows that approximately 1 in 6 men were sexually abused during their childhood or adolescent years.  

Importantly, this number only includes those who admitted they had been abused.  There are many men who feel too shamed and afraid to admit that they were sexually abused, so they live with these secrets that continue to haunt them throughout adulthood.

The trauma of sexual abuse will not heal on it’s own, and the ramifications are severe and lasting.

Dr. Richard Gartner, writing for Psychology Today, states that,

Many sexually abused boys grow up distrustful, considering people dishonest, malevolent, and undependable. They often become frightened of emotional connection and isolate themselves.

Describing the ongoing dysfunction caused by sexual abuse, he adds that,

Confusing affection with abuse, desire with tenderness, sexually abused boys often become men who have difficulty distinguishing among sex, love, nurturance, affection, and abuse.

His conclusion is that,

Boys who grow up without coming to terms with their childhood abuse often struggle as men with addictions, anxiety, depression, and thoughts of suicide as well as the inability to develop or maintain relationships.

This is reason enough to encourage men to join the “Me Too” movement.  Sexual abuse and trauma is not just a women’s issue, but is a human issue.


There Are Negative Ramifications For Not Joining The “Me Too” Movement


➢ Have to continue to live in secrecy and shame

➢ Have to continue to live with the pain of the trauma

➢ Have to continue to live in fear and anxiety


Even more, when victims of sexual abuse stay in hiding, the likelihood of becoming a victimizer increases dramatically. 

I don’t personally know Harvey Weinstein, but chances are that he was sexually traumatized at some point growing up. 

The reality is that the trauma that is not healed, will eventually impact the choices we make to numb the pain we experienced, and find pleasure to compensate.  

Eventually, these choices we make to counter the feelings of inadequacy, insecurity, and unworthiness become runaway trains of out of control sexual behavior, and it’s not long before the victim becomes the victimizer.

It’s time to join the “Me Too” movement before we become a train wreck.  

The good news is that we can turn the train around, and begin the process of healing and wholeness, so that we experience wellbeing in every area of our life, setting ourselves up for fulfilling healthy relationships that consist of love, nurture, and care.


How To Join The “Me Too” Movement:

1. Become aware that this movement is for you

2. Take a step of courage to be honest with someone about what happened

Honesty is one of the most courageous acts that anyone could attempt. 

When we become honest with ourselves, it becomes easier to be honest with someone else.  When we become honest with someone else, we can begin the healing process.

You may not feel comfortable at this point in sharing your sexual trauma and abuse with the entire world, but it is important that you begin to share with someone.


Here are a few keys to finding the right someone:


➢ They should be safe

➢ They should be able to listen without judgment

➢ They should be empathetic and encouraging
 

Oftentimes, it is valuable to share with a professional, who is trained to walk a person through the pain of sexual trauma, as well as leading them down the pathway of healing and wholeness.

Whether you are a woman or a man, the fallout of sexual abuse is complex and devastating.  

There Is Hope For Those Who Join The “Me Too” Movement

When we take risk to reveal the secrets that have kept us captive for so long, we experience a freedom from the heavy weight of shame that seeks to keep us enslaved.

I’m looking forward to the day when the “Me Too” movement moves from acknowledgement to the solution of wholeness.  But, that can only begin as we take courage to step towards the recognition that it is “Me Too”.

It’s only then that the truth will set us free.

We hope this blog has been encouraging and helpful to you and that you find the courage to shed secrecy, and rid yourself of that weight of shame.  Let us know how you are doing in this process.

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